Dear Subscriber First Name

It’s no exaggeration that I regularly hear super intelligent people tell me things like “i’m a failure!” or “i just got lucky!”.

They describe their life journey through through a perceived inevitability that failure is just around the corner.

This is despite their indisputable success - jeeez!

In one extreme case, I watched a brilliantly talented guy nearly end up in the foetal position because he believed he wasn’t working hard enough (He was working upwards of 80 hours a week).

Clearly there’s some pretty deep seated beliefs at the wheel here - which is the essence of what Schema Coaching addresses.

And so this is where I might pull out a Schema Challenge Card in the coaching space.

This simple, yet powerful tool is brilliant at untangling the ball of fishing wire representing our thoughts and feelings that cause stress and anxiety. Let’s take a closer look…

Meet Jess - a high achieving professional we helped with perfectionism and a lack of work/life balance:

🔍 Jess: “I’m Too Hard On Myself”

As you can see in the attached, Jess’ Schema Challenge Card revealed several key factors about her:

• Jess’ Schemas: Unrelenting Standards and Self-Sacrifice (Jess’ perfectionism)

• Jess’ Origins: Parents who were workaholics and tied family life to work performance, and consequently -

• Jess’ ingrained belief (schema ‘distortion’): “If I’m not constantly improving, I’m not good enough.”

This is exactly what the Schema Challenge Card aims to identify and help straighten up.

Let’s look at Jess’ completed Schema Challenge Card in more detail….

Jess started by detailing the situation that’s troubling her (too hard on self!) and how this is making her ‘feel’ (frustrated) and why (the trigger)…

Next, Jess and her Coach identified her schemas of Unrelenting Standards and Self sacrifice - this is code for Jess’ perfectionism…

Jess was able to clearly make a link to the origin of her behaving this way - stemming from her parents own workaholism….

Her parents having no ‘off’ switch contributed to Jess’ own inability to know when to stop or even slow down…

Having made sense of her behavioural patterns, Jess can now start to consider an alternative view - based on her past experiences.

Jess is about to learn why it’s called a ‘Challenge’ card…

The Breakthrough…

As you can see above, identifying past successes allows Jess to move from her negative self view to a healthy one with specific life examples that support this healthy view.

“I get lots done, my boss thinks i’m a top performer, i can totally take a break”

(When on holiday) “I truly switched off and didn’t think about work”

Over to you Jess….

Whilst Jess acknowledges that schemas will continue to challenge her, she’s now armed with a powerful alternative healthy response:

“i’m not all about work, what i do is enough - i’m my own person!”

Jess has now set the scene for future challenges and only needs to follow the Behavioural Instruction:

💡 Why It Works

The Schema Challenge Card works because it helps clients:
✅ Interrupt the automatic cycle
✅ Challenge the distorted thoughts
✅ Try new, healthier behaviours
✅ See the real-world evidence that contradicts the schema

This creates a powerful feedback loop of change — one small shift at a time.

✅ Try It Yourself

Take a moment to read Jess’s Schema Challenge card from start to finish, then give it a go yourself -

👉 Schema Challenge Card

Then ask:

• What’s a situation I feel stuck in?

• What schema might be driving it?

• What’s the reality — and what can I do differently next time?

Even filling it out once can bring surprising clarity.

But here’s the truth — consistency is key, because schemas are so resistant to change. It takes practice, and then more practice! That’s where Schema Coaching comes in.

I’d LOVE to know your experience of using the Schema Challenge Card. Of course, i’m ALWAYS up for a chat if you’re curious, stuck or just wanna know more.

So What's Next?

Hmm, well this week was a big topic - so i’m wondering if I might follow this up with different ways and scenarios for using the Schema Challenge card.

Heck I might even introduce you to my vulnerable child ;)

thanks for reading!

Tim :)

Schema Coaching - Go Deeper